Missing Your Ex Doesn’t Make You Crazy (But It Might Feel That Way)

There’s always that one person (a former partner, lover, or “the one that got away”) who leaves a deep, indelible mark on your heart.

They don’t just disappear when life takes you in a different direction. Their presence lingers. You feel it when your phone lights up, when a stranger passes by wearing their scent, or when you catch yourself hoping you’ll run into them at the spot you always went to together.

Maybe, years later, you even find yourself Googling their name, not because you want them back, but because a part of you still wonders who they’ve become.

This is the one who expanded what you thought was possible for you in love.
And sometimes, it’s not just them you miss, it’s the version of yourself you were when you loved them.

It’s all very romantic, right?

Until you start dating again, meeting new people, opening your heart and body to new energies — and those quiet, haunting thoughts start to whisper:

“How do I even do this again?”
“Why doesn’t this feel as exciting as it did with my ex?”
“Ugh, I’m going to have to teach someone how to touch my body all over again…”
“This person will never compare to my ex.”

A client of mine once told me, through tears, that he missed his ex’s morning breath. That’s how real, raw, and tender our attachments can be.

If you’re feeling this too, please know this: you’re not broken.
You’re simply human and you shared a love story that shaped you.

Grief and Desire Can Coexist

Healing after a breakup doesn’t mean erasing your past. It means integrating it.
You don’t have to force yourself to “get over it,” and you don’t have to stay trapped in grief to honor it.

You can let your ex be part of your story, as long as they don’t become the author of what comes next.

Here’s how to begin writing your next chapter:

1. Honor What Was

Create a small ritual of gratitude. Thank that relationship for what it taught you. The moments that shaped you, the parts of yourself love helped you discover, and the ways that connection helped you grow.

Light a candle. Write a letter you never send. Bless what was, and release what no longer serves.

2. Let It Become a Map, Not a Memory to Mourn

That relationship showed you what’s possible. You now have a blueprint of love; What works for you, what doesn’t, and what you crave next.

Write it down. Get clear. Use that map to guide your next chapter, not hold you hostage in the past.

3. Acknowledge the Nervous System Imprint

The one that got away didn’t take your power with them. They activated something sacred within you. They reminded you of your capacity to feel deeply, to love boldly, and to create beauty in connection.

That part of you is still here. That’s yours to keep.

4. Use This Affirmation as Your Emotional Reset

Say it out loud:

“That relationship showed me something beautiful that I am capable of having. It is proof that I am worthy of great love…
or better.”

Repeat it when comparison arises. Let it be a touchstone when your heart aches for what was.

You Can Miss Them and Still Move Forward

You don’t need to pretend the past doesn’t still touch you. But you also don’t need to let it prevent you from receiving the love that’s trying to meet you now.

Healing after a breakup is not about closing your heart. It’s about softening it again, trusting yourself again, and opening to love from a deeper, more embodied place.

If you’re in that tender, in-between space like missing your ex but knowing you’re ready for something new, this is the work I do.

I help women open their hearts again, without rushing or bypassing what’s real, so they can attract love from a place of wholeness, power, and self-worth.

💗 Book a free discovery call here to explore what’s possible for you in your next chapter of love.